There is an elf in the tribe that simply rubs me the wrong way. I don’t normally try to judge a person by their race, I have quite a few elf friends but something about this one makes my alarms up. Perhaps it was because she was asking so many sexual questions about Urukha and myself.. or perhaps she trys to be a little to physically friendly with me. Either way I do not trust her, I know she is family she is of the tribe but there is something about her. Yesterday she asked Westel several questions pertaining to his watch, of course it was just me and Urukha and well we were busy being lovey dovey. I personally am just happy with my soon to be lifemate, but if Uru wants to mate with another I am forced to do what makes her happy. She tells me often she is happy with me and only me but that is what Chopsie said, and often with failed lifematings one seems to always question themselves about these things.
Am I boring, do I restrict to much? I often lay awake snuggled next to Urkha wondering when she will grow bored of me. No matter how much my soon to be lifemate reminds me the shadows of that past always seem to overwhelm me. I find my own temper growing shorter and shorter for those whom assume my lack of intelligence, and even when others insult my lifemate Chopsie I find losing my own sanity to anger. I know many of them want the best for me, saw me when I was miserable but I suppose others don’t remember the absolute bliss she brought me when we were together, I would have never asked her to lifemate with me if –I- was not in love with her and I was truly and deeply. Urukha brought up a good point of her possibly lying to me about not remembering whom I was. Either way it does not matter, I have decided to let her live her life, to possibly fall in love with a male and make a family that she has always wanted. If or when she ever remembers me or needs me, I am bound by duty if she remembers me or not to lay my life down for her, she is my lifemate.
I remember Chopsie and my first hunt together, the poor orcess could not set up a tent to save her life. That night she found tracks of the snow leopard we hunted and to my own fault the leopard found us and scratched the hell out of my face, but at the end we had a snow leopard couples blanket. She bitched complained but she had fun, not only she told me but I could see the light in her eyes. I took our my belly button ring, it hurt to much to look down at the scared flesh I pierced for her. It will remain there for the rest of my life as a reminder of my once love for her. I looked at the red ring this morning the little gem sparkling in the morning light and it reminded me how much Chopsie and Uru have in common, it also reminded me how much they differed. Urukha’s and my love is different from Chopsies and mine. Chopsie loved the leadership in social situations, I was her slave in those moments and I enjoyed being in the shadows and listening to my lifemate laughing and having a good time. Uru is more submissive in all situations but yet she is more independent, I enjoy my soon to be lifemates personality with her pirate loving flaws and all.
No comments:
Post a Comment